Welcome to
JCADA's
Teen Corner
Welcome to the Teen Corner of JCADA's website.
This space is dedicated to empowering teens with the knowledge and resources they need to build healthy relationships and recognize the signs of abuse. If you are age 16+ and have experienced dating violence, we're here to help! Leave us a confidential message at 1-877-885-2232 or support@jcada.org.
When we create respectful relationships earlier in life, we create - for ourselves and our community - a brighter, healthier, safer future.
Understanding the different types of abuse, whether emotional, physical, sexual, or digital, is crucial in fostering a safe environment for yourself and your peers.
By exploring the information and tools provided here, you can learn to identify harmful behaviors and seek support if needed.
Types of Teen Dating Violence
Abusive relationships begin subtly and escalate over time. They rarely start with physical violence. Instead, there's typically a period of time where the abuser slowly gains power and control and undermines your confidence.
Early warning signs can include excessive jealousy, constant monitoring, isolation from friends and family, and belittling or criticizing you frequently. These behaviors may seem minor at first but can gradually intensify, leading to more severe forms of abuse.
Recognizing these early signs and the different ways abuse can show up in a relationship is crucial in preventing the escalation of violence and maintaining your safety and well-being.
EMOTIONAL
Most common amongst teens. Seeks to break down a person's confidence, self-worth, and identity so they can control, isolate and/or frighten.
PHYSICAL
The intentional, unwanted contact with your body or personal space that causes or has the intention of causing you fear, injury, disability, or death.
SEXUAL
Behaviors that force, pressure, or coerces someone to do something sexually that they don’t want to do or make someone feel uncomfortable
around sexual content.
DIGITAL
Using technology like apps, texting, and social media to bully, stalk, harass, control, blackmail, manipulate, or intimidate another person.
FINANCIAL
When one partner has control over the other partner’s ability to access, gain, use, or maintain financial resources.
SPIRITUAL
Using religion or
spirituality to control, harass, ridicule, or intimidate someone else. This includes shaming someone for their beliefs.
IDENTITY
Leverage systemic
oppression to harm an individual. This can include outing a person's sexuality before they are ready or insulting their identity - racial, ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc.
STALKING
Pattern of behavior where someone watches, follows, or harasses you, making you feel uncomfortable, afraid, or unsafe. Stalking can take place in-person or online.
Power & Control
We all have relationships in our lives. This includes friends, family members, romantic and/or sexual partners, classmates, teachers, and more. Understanding how to develop and maintain healthy relationships can help prevent relationships from turning unhealthy or abusive.
The teen power and control wheel displays behaviors a person might use in an unhealthy and abusive relationship. Watch this video for a further explanation of the Power and Control Relationship Wheel.
Image Credit: Created and licensed by Walnut Avenue Family and Women's Center ©2023.
What does it mean to have healthy boundaries?
Boundaries are the limits we set for ourselves, both individually and in our relationships, to show what is and what is not okay for us.
What does it mean to give consent?
Consent is how we tell people what is or isn’t okay to do with us or to us. One must always ask for consent before any physical or sexual act. Consent must be given freely, verbally, enthusiastically, specifically, and can be taken back at any time.
Examples of Healthy Boundaries
EMOTIONAL
Not wanting to share intimate details about your relationship with your best friend.
PHYSICAL
Being comfortable with kissing but not wanting to do it in public or in front of other people.
DIGITAL
Not giving your partner your login info to Instagram and other social media accounts.
FINANCIAL
Not letting a friend
borrow money until they pay you back for what they already owe you.
To break-up or to not break-up? That is the question...
We get it, break-ups are not easy. More often than not, they are messy. However, you understand your circumstances better than anyone, including your emotions towards your partner. You deserve to be safe, respected and loved.
If you're in a relationship that feels unhealthy or abusive, deciding on the next steps can be challenging. Every emotion you're experiencing is valid, even if you still care deeply for your partner despite their harmful behavior. The priority is your well-being and future, rather than the past you share.
Here are five steps to support your emotional and physical safety if you choose to end a relationship.
BREAK-UP SAFETY PLAN
1.
Inform Your Network
Identify a support network of trusted adults and friends who can provide emotional and potentially physical support. Inform them about your situation and your plan to end the relationship.
2.
Choose a Location
Choose a public place where help is available if needed (e.g., coffee shop, mall, etc.). Choose a location you can leave easily and inform a trusted friend of the time and place.
3.
Set & Share Boundaries
Decide in advance whether you want to maintain any contact and, if so, what form it should take (e.g., only through text or not at all). Communicate these boundaries clearly and stick to them. This will help you create the space you need to heal and move forward.
4.
Prioritize Your Healing
Prioritize your well-being by engaging in self-care activities that promote your mental, emotional, and physical health. Make time for things that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercise, spending time with supportive friends, or seeking professional counseling if needed.
5.
Give Space for Emotions
Understand that it’s completely natural to miss your partner, even if the relationship was unhealthy or abusive. Feelings of attachment and nostalgia are part of the healing process and don’t invalidate your decision to prioritize your well-being. Allow yourself to experience these emotions without guilt, recognizing that it’s a normal part of moving forward.
Self-Care
Self-care is a way of taking care of ourselves, in body, mind, emotion, and spirit. Self-care is crucial in our ability to maintain healthy functioning, reduce stress and burnout, and engage in meaningful activities. Self-care allows us to maintain a sense of independence, and it provides us with an outlet to manage our emotions. Hover over each image to learn how the activity can help you take care of you!
Know the
Terms:
Understanding
Healthy
Relationships
Empowering yourself starts with understanding the language of healthy relationships. In this glossary, you'll find key terms and definitions that can help you recognize what respect, boundaries, and safety look like in your interactions. Whether you're navigating friendships or romantic relationships, knowing these terms will guide you in making informed, confident decisions.
ACCOUNTABILITY
To accept responsibility for one’s own words and/or actions.
CONSENT
The way that we tell people what is or isn’t okay to do with us or to us.
LOVE-BOMBING
A way of establishing control and a sense of trust early in the relationship by showering a new partner or friend with affection, compliments, gifts, or favors.
SELF-CARE
A way of taking care of ourselves, in body, mind, emotion, and spirit. Self-care is crucial in our ability to maintain healthy functioning, reduce stress and burnout, and engage in meaningful activities.
BOUNDARIES
The limits we set for ourselves, both individually and in our relationships, to show what is and what is not okay with us.
CONTROL
To influence or direct someone else’s behavior and/or experience.
MANIPULATION
To control or influence another for one’s own advantage or gain.
TEEN DATING VIOLENCE
A pattern of abuse used by one person in a current or past dating relationship to exert power and control over another when either partner is a teenager.
COERCION
To use physical and/or emotional threats or intimidation to obtain compliance.
GASLIGHTING
When someone manipulates a person into doubting their own perceptions, experiences, or understanding of events.
RELATIONSHIP
A connection that you have with someone in your life.
TOXIC
A detrimental and unhealthy connection characterized by behaviors that undermine one’s well-being, such as emotional manipulation, disrespect, control, and a lack of support.
Additional Resources
General Information